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Outsource magazine: thought-leadership and outsourcing strategy | August 24, 2017

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TOP TEN: Outsourcing Rock Bands

TOP TEN: Outsourcing Rock Bands
Top Ten

Outsourcing and popular music might not seem like the most obvious of bedfellows – but some of the most defining acts of the last half-century have emerged from the global business transformation space. Don’t believe us? Read on…

1. Lean
Creators of some of the biggest hits in rock, including ‘Bohemian Captive Centre’ and ‘Who Wants To Process Invoices Forever?’, Lean’s place in music history was assured even before the tragic, untimely death of their lead singer following a prolonged benchmarking engagement. The revenues continue to roll in thanks to the ongoing success of their smash West End hit We Will Offshore You.

2. Red Hot Contract Negotiators
If parading in front of thousands of screaming fans wearing only modesty-preserving socks wasn’t enough. these West Coast rockers went on to contribute to a 15% reduction in per-FTE cost on the second-generation deal. Remarkable.

3. Crosby, Stills, Nash & Tata
They said it couldn’t be done – but millions of records and thousands of broken hearts later, this hemisphere-bridging supergroup has proved ‘em all wrong. Perhaps it’s the combination of bass guitar and swarabat; or maybe it’s the access to tens of thousands of engineering graduates plus some of the most poignant lyrics the late Sixties had to offer; who knows? Who cares? These guys ROCK.

4. Lbr Rbtrg
OK, so they never really equalled the heights of ‘Sweet Home Gurgaon’, but then who has? Lbr Rbtrg shouldn’t be judged on one masterpiece; rather, their corpus should be analysed in toto, viewed from afar and assessed at arm’s length, before being relocated to a Tier 3 location as soon as the requisite uptime can be guaranteed.

5. The H-1B52s
Who hasn’t found themselves driving at speed down a coastal road in the sun, head bopping along to ‘Love SSC’? One of the most infuriatingly catchy numbers to emerge from the post-9/11 American isolationist resurgence, this track perfectly sums up the H-1B52s: really, really annoying.

6. The Beautiful South Africa
“I need a little time,” they sang, and a generation’s heart winced – though not as much as it would have done had said “little time” not been so deliciously aligned with Western European business hours.

7. Florence + The Robotic Process Automation
How better to humanise software that will render employment a distant memory and leave us nothing more than vermin scrabbling in the filth for the last calories on Earth, than by draping it in dazzling scarlet hair and a sequinned playsuit and giving it a voice that could charm even the most lifeless algorithm into something akin to a wan grimace?

8. Thirty Seconds to Manila
The focus may have been seized by their charismatic – and Oscar-winning – lead singer but let’s not let that take anything away from the tunes – which are delivered in near-faultless Hispanic-accented American English at around one-third of the cost of an onshore team member.

9. Nine Inch SLAs
Talking of Oscar-winning lead singers… No but seriously Trent Reznor won an Oscar. For Best Original Score for The Social Network. Yes he did. Look. Told you. And his real name is Michael. Fact.

10. Shared Services and the Blowfish
That awful scratching sound you can hear isn’t the scraping of this article’s barrel; it’s Darius Rucker singing the next quarter’s process improvement targets in at least seven major languages from a warehouse 22 miles outside Krakow. Dostać się do pracy!


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